In a relationship when you have two emotionally shattered or broken people that relationship is a train wreck waiting to happen.
If there are two people within a relationship and they both have experienced deep hurts because of rejection and those wounds have never healed, it can create a codependent disposition within their relationship(s).
Story, I know a couple who got married. This was the husband & wife second marriage. The husband grew up without a father figure and the relationship with his mother was complex because his mother was headstrong. Now the wife also grew up without a father figure and was raised by her grandmother. In both of their first marriages they faced some type of abuse. The husband was cheated on several times by his wife which was emotionally abusive. The wife was physically abused by her ex-husband. Both parties got together with these deep seeded issues and in the midst of their marriage their inner issues came to a complete head, "A train wreck" Why? They didn't conqueror or heal from the hurts they experienced in their past. There was a deep wound in their soul that needed healing and in their troubled souls there was a raging war going on.
They tried to bring peace by reaching out to what only brought a temporary gratification, but still left their soul empty with a deep void. That deep void in turn created a codependency.
Don't let a codependent person fool you they are needy, they need to be needed. They will act like they all for you, by blessing you in some way, shape or form, but it’s really according to their selfish agenda, "Self-gratification", the need for validation and affirmation. Being needed make them feel valued of some importance.
When a codependent person doesn’t have anyone reaching out to them in need, they will reach toward a feeling of false fulfillment such as status, achievements and substances trying to fill a void.
When you are codependent you are a clear target for manipulation and control, but codependent people also manipulate and control with subtle suggestions (actions or words).
I said all that to say this. We do need people in our lives because God uses people to help us to grow, but a person can not bring a peace to our raging souls.
We shouldn't walk with a sense of entitlement, and with a expectation that a person suppose to bring complete happiness to our souls. This mindset will steal our peace & joy and leave our emotions unguarded and wounded, because of false expectations.
Lets not put our happiness in the hands of another human being, but it's God who gives complete (full) joy through Jesus Christ by the Holy Spirit.
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.